I repeatedly receive questions from agitated wives who feel traumatized when they learn that their husband is homosexual. The length of their marriages range from a few years to 20 and 30 years together. Many have children, of differing ages, with their husbands. They either accidentally find out about their spouse or the husband steps "out of the closet" to reveal his sexual orientation. Always, this is met with shock, despair and betrayal. In a very few cases, partners knew about this even before marriage. In these types of cases, conscious and mutual decisions were made about marriage, monogamy, and children.
Source: http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=42416&cn=55
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